I remember hearing people say, "God works in mysterious ways," and not really getting it. I have now come to the conclusion that God works in a way that isn't at all mysterious. I believe we (human beings) are the hands of God and through us he moves and creates and sustains the world.
As you've probably noticed, I haven't been around the blog world much lately. Uumomma even emailed me recently to check in on me because I'd been feeling low when last I was posting a lot. I'm popping in tonight to let everyone know that my absence from the blogosphere isn't really due to an emotional low (thank God), but rather the hectic life that this time of year usually brings. As the kids get older it gets even more busy.
In the past six weeks I have:
1. subbed almost daily in one particular elementary school
2. led five Cub Scout meetings including a hike to earn Forester badges
3. dropped off and picked up from band practice kid #1 sixteen times
4. chaperoned 5 day-long high school marching band contest trips
5. taken kid #2 to 5 soccer practices
6. taken kid #3 to the public library 4 times
7. attended 6 Saturday morning soccer games
8. attended church 6 times (one of those times teaching RE)
9. attended one UU Christian Circle meeting
10. attended two band parents' association meetings
11. attended one Boy Scout Court of Honor/pitch-in picnic
12. delivered kid #1 to two separate weekend parties
Basically, I have been going 7 days a week for at least 4 weeks and the couple of weeks prior to that was almost that busy. On top of that, we have computer wars at my house. I have kid #3 wanting to play Reader Rabbit or Sesame Street games, kid #2 wanting to play Jedi Academy or look up Pokemon info online, kid #1 wanting to chat with his friends on myspace or facebook, and husband wanting to catch up on blogs, email, or myspace. My computer time is so limited, blogging has become a luxury. But soccer and marching season are ending soon, so hopefully I'll be back again soon.
Keeping busy has been a blessing. It has done two things: 1. It keeps me from dwelling on our financial problems and my difficulty finding a job. 2. It reminds me what is really important in life. One warm Saturday afternoon as I sat on the sidelines watching my son belt out part of the marching band show at the climax of the music, I was moved to tears. Those are the moments I live for. No creditor or possible employer can ever take away from me the joy I felt at watching my son perform. What food we did or didn't have at home didn't matter one bit in that moment.
An interesting thing has happened over the last month or so. We have been sustained. As I said at the beginning of this post, I believe God moves on this earth through the hands of the people around us. At a time when I often wondered where our next meal would come from or how we would have enough gas to get to work until payday, little things started happening. Friends and family would do small "coincidental" things that helped to sustain us and get us through. For example, one day at work, a coworker of Big J's asked him if we'd be interested in some meat for some Philly Beef Steak sandwiches. Apparently he and his girlfriend had gotten some and didn't care for it so offered it to us as a gift. Unsolicited by us. They had no idea that we'd been trying to figure out what to have for dinner. Several other similar things happened around that same time when we were at rock bottom. I really believe that God sustained us.
We are not out of the woods. Things are still tight, but we are recovering. And I have more good news. Last week, the principal came up to me and offered me a 10-week maternity leave. It isn't a full-time job, but it is a stepping stone. Not having a maternity leave has been an obstacle in my way preventing me from getting an interview in the past. So I am turning a corner.
My faith has been strengthened by this hardship. And every day I thank God.
Labels: Blogging, Family, Friends, My Spiritual Search